(Proverbs 26:28 KJV) A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it; and a flattering mouth worketh ruin.
It is very easy for us to fall into this trap. I see it on a regular basis at school. Maybe you can see some parallels in your day.
Recently we had a meeting about a student who was having problems. Out of four core classes he was failing three and almost failing the fourth. His citizenship grades reflected the same. How did we start off the meeting? The administrator in charge said, “Let’s go around first and share some of the child’s strengths in the classroom.” I wanted to say, “We are not here because of his strengths. We are here because he has none. Let’s deal with the real issues, lack of work, lack of effort, bad attitude, tardiness, etc.” Because I want to keep my job I said nothing. I listened as the other teachers described a wonderful, well behaved boy. The entire time was spent “flattering” (2509) the child.
In the process we were working “ruin” (4072). He went out of the meeting figuring that he had fooled us again. His sluggardly behavior was reinforced. We as a group had smoothed the way for him to keep falling on his face and face disaster in his life.
So? Find ways to love people enough to tell them the truth. It may save their life and their soul.