(Proverbs 19:11 KJV) The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression.
“Discretion” (7922) is a mark of spiritual maturity. It is defined as prudence and insight. We like that part but we don’t stop to think how that works out in our behavior. A person with discretion does not blow his top over every little thing that comes up. How does that work? I think that one habit produced by this quality is to try and understand events from the other person’s point of view. I can always point out where someone has gone wrong. What is hard for me is understanding how they arrived at their position. To them it is logical and obvious. To me it is emotional and irrational. It helps to understand that they look at my position the same way.
“Anger” (639) has its place. I have a hard time believing that Jesus was not angry when He drove the money changers out of the temple. I don’t think He was warm and fuzzy when He called Peter Satan and told him to go away. Don’t get the idea that the anger is the sin. The sin is the speed of the anger. When our anger is “slow” (748) it does not control us. It becomes the spice, not the main ingredient.
So? Be honest with yourself. Be honest about yourself and others. If you have problems with anger, don’t ignore it. Work on it. It starts with admitting it to yourself. Others already know. Make it a matter of prayer. Ask that the Lord would bring it to your attention at the stage when you can deal with it, not after the explosion. Expect to fail at first but remember that God has been working with short tempers a long time.